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Doctorate of High-Speed Knowledge Ingestion
YouTube Academy of 2x Playback
Conferred for successfully consuming thousands of hours of computer architecture, operating system kernels, and language specs without falling asleep.
⏱️ Verified: 4,500+ Hours Watched
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Master of Algorithmic Prompting & Necromancy
Substrate Institute of Late-Night Hacking
Awarded for enduring 100,000 multi-turn agent interactions, debugging rogue context windows, and wrestling LLMs into deterministic submission.
⏱️ Verified: 3,200+ Hours Prompting
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Bachelor of Extension Engineering & PEZ Architecture
Hobos Inc. University of Terminal Tools
Honored for designing zero-pip, self-healing mycelium preserves that run without site-packages pollution or desktop client lockups.
⏱️ Verified: 2,800+ Hours Coding